Day 52 June 8, 2022

“To the suicidal mind, you can feel trapped. You can feel suffocated by the state of your psycheand there seems like there is no way out. Day in and day out, you deal with the mental agonyand anguish that both frightens you and pushes you at the same time. You feel that death is the only way out, but at the same time, the human in you desperately want to fightto cling onto hope. To cling onto life.” Kevin’s

My Daily Focus

How am I feeling mentally?

Ridiculous really

How am I feeling physically?


How am I feeling spiritually?

Trying for hope

What are my goals for the day?

Only focus on me, but I cant seem to do that



just for today – June 8

“This program offers hope. All you have to bring with you is the desire to stop using and the willingness to try this new way of life.”

IP No. 16, “For the Newcomer”

From time to time we wonder if we’re “doing it right” in Narcotics Anonymous. Are we attending enough meetings? Are we using our sponsor, or working the steps, or speaking, or reading, or living the “right” way? We value the fellowship of recovering addicts – we don’t know what we’d do without it. What if the way we’re practicing our program is “wrong?” Does that make us “bad” NA members?

We can settle our insecurities by reviewing our Third Tradition, which assures us that “the only requirement for membership is a desire to stop using.” There aren’t any rules that say we’ve got to attend this many meetings or these particular meetings, or work the “steps” this way at this pace, or live our lives to suit these people in order to remain NA members in good standing.

It’s true that, if we want the kind of recovery we see in members we respect, well want to practice the kind of program that’s made their recovery possible. But NA is a fellowship of freedom; we work the program the best way for us, not for someone else. The only requirement for membership is a desire to stop using.

Just for today: I will look at the program I’m working in light of my own recovery. I will practice that program to the best of my ability.

9am to 11am Morning Process with Darren

Cognitive Behavioral Theory/Strategies:

Do we have a choice?

Change thoughts then change actions.

I give circumstances meaning. No one makes you feel, you make you feel.

ABC Model


Money is literally making me sick to my stomach right now. I need to pay off my restitution and my classes and I havent a clue how. I can not work. I cant get to work. Mike says that if I work I can only save it. According to the new kind of R.O.I. (Release of Information HIPPA – Marriage Counselors aka my therapist). If I pay my fines and finish the classes I can see my son maybe even Mike but thats 50/50 at the moment. I need to figure this out. Time for some math.

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